Post by graybeard on Jan 30, 2012 9:37:31 GMT -6
There's a record by that name from 1923, and the audio is available, but I haven't found a transcription. I did, however, just find:
Will says:
Ten men in the country could buy the world and ten million can’t buy enough to eat.
We don’t have to worry about anything. No nation in the history of the world was ever sitting as pretty. If we want anything, all we have to do is go and buy it on credit.
This would be a great time in the world for some man to come along that knew something.
We will never have true civilization until we have learned to recognize the rights of others.
Mothers are the only race of people that speak the same tongue. A mother in Manchuria could converse with a mother in Nebraska and never miss a word.
My ancestors didn’t come over on the Mayflower, but they met the boat. (He was 1/4 Cherokee.)
Villains are getting as thick as college degrees and sometimes on the same fellow.
When the judgment day comes, civilization will have an alibi: “I never took a human life I only sold the fellow the gun to take it with.”
They want peace. But they want a gun to get it with.
America can carry herself and get along in pretty fair shape, but when she stops and picks up the whole world and puts it on her shoulders she just can’t “get it done.”
The difference between our rich and poor grows greater every year. Our distribution of wealth is getting more uneven all the time. A man can make a million and he is on every page in the morning. But it never tells you who gave up that million he got. You can’t get money without taking it from somebody.
Let this country get hungry and they are going to eat, no matter what happens to budgets, income taxes or Wall Street. Washington mustn’t forget who rules when it comes to a show down.
We elect our Presidents, be they Republican or Democrat, then start daring ’em to make good.
It takes nerve to be a Democrat, but it takes money to be a Republican.
When newspapers knock a man a lot, there is sure to be a lot of good in him.
There ought to be a law against anybody going to Europe until they had seen the things we have in this country.
Somebody is always telling us in the papers how to prevent war. There is only one way in the World to prevent war, and that is, FOR EVERY NATION TO TEND TO ITS OWN BUSINESS.
Live your life so that whenever you lose, you are ahead.
The Republican platform promises to do better. I don’t think they have done so bad. Everybody’s broke but them.
Democrats take the whole thing as a joke. Republicans take it serious but run it like a joke.
I will admit it has rained more under Republican administrations. That was partially because they have had more administration than Democrats.
The platform will always be the same, promise everything, deliver nothing.
A cannibal is a good deal like a Democrat, they are forced to live off each other.
Republicans take care of big money, for big money takes care of them.
I have not aligned myself with any party. Sitting tight waiting for an attractive offer.
I generally give the party in power, whether Republican or Democrat, the more digs because they are generally doing the country more damage. The party in power drawing a salary is to be knocked.
I hope some of the men who get the most votes will be elected.
A flock of Democrats will replace a mess of Republicans. It won’t mean a thing. They will go in like all the rest of ’em. Go in on promises and come out on alibis.
The Republicans mopped up, the Democrats gummed up, and I will now try and sum up. Things are terribly dull now. We won’t have any more serious comedy until Congress meets.
You’ve got to admit that each party is worse than the other. The one that’s out always looks the best.
If a man wants to stand well socially, he can’t afford to be seen with either the Democrats or the Republicans.
Republicans want a man that can lend dignity to the office. Democrats want a man that will lend some money.
Republicans have always been the party of big business. The Democrats of small business. So you just take your pick. The Democrats have their eye on a dime and the Republicans on a dollar.
If by some divine act of providence we could get rid of both parties and hire some good men, like any other good business does, that would be sitting pretty.
Both parties have their good times and bad times at different times. Good when they are out. Bad when they are in.
There ain’t any finer folks living than a Republican that votes the Democratic ticket.
Ohio claims they are due a president as they haven’t had one since Taft. Look at the United States, they have not had one since Lincoln.
You could keep politics clean if you could figure out some way so your government never hired anyone.
No mathematician in this country has ever been able to figure out how many hundred straw votes it takes to equal one legitimate vote.
No animal in the world gets quite as hungry as a Democrat. He would rather make a speech than a dollar.
The whole trouble with the Republicans is their fear of an increase in income tax, especially on higher incomes.
Sometimes it makes you think we don’t need a different man as much as we need different advisors for the same man.
If we could just send the same bunch of men to Washington for the good of the nation and not for political reasons, we could have the most perfect government in the world.
The truth can hurt you worse in an election than about anything that could happen to you.
---------------------
All these quotes, and many, many more, were before he was killed in 1935.
www.willrogers.com/says/will_says.html
Will says:
Ten men in the country could buy the world and ten million can’t buy enough to eat.
We don’t have to worry about anything. No nation in the history of the world was ever sitting as pretty. If we want anything, all we have to do is go and buy it on credit.
This would be a great time in the world for some man to come along that knew something.
We will never have true civilization until we have learned to recognize the rights of others.
Mothers are the only race of people that speak the same tongue. A mother in Manchuria could converse with a mother in Nebraska and never miss a word.
My ancestors didn’t come over on the Mayflower, but they met the boat. (He was 1/4 Cherokee.)
Villains are getting as thick as college degrees and sometimes on the same fellow.
When the judgment day comes, civilization will have an alibi: “I never took a human life I only sold the fellow the gun to take it with.”
They want peace. But they want a gun to get it with.
America can carry herself and get along in pretty fair shape, but when she stops and picks up the whole world and puts it on her shoulders she just can’t “get it done.”
The difference between our rich and poor grows greater every year. Our distribution of wealth is getting more uneven all the time. A man can make a million and he is on every page in the morning. But it never tells you who gave up that million he got. You can’t get money without taking it from somebody.
Let this country get hungry and they are going to eat, no matter what happens to budgets, income taxes or Wall Street. Washington mustn’t forget who rules when it comes to a show down.
We elect our Presidents, be they Republican or Democrat, then start daring ’em to make good.
It takes nerve to be a Democrat, but it takes money to be a Republican.
When newspapers knock a man a lot, there is sure to be a lot of good in him.
There ought to be a law against anybody going to Europe until they had seen the things we have in this country.
Somebody is always telling us in the papers how to prevent war. There is only one way in the World to prevent war, and that is, FOR EVERY NATION TO TEND TO ITS OWN BUSINESS.
Live your life so that whenever you lose, you are ahead.
The Republican platform promises to do better. I don’t think they have done so bad. Everybody’s broke but them.
Democrats take the whole thing as a joke. Republicans take it serious but run it like a joke.
I will admit it has rained more under Republican administrations. That was partially because they have had more administration than Democrats.
The platform will always be the same, promise everything, deliver nothing.
A cannibal is a good deal like a Democrat, they are forced to live off each other.
Republicans take care of big money, for big money takes care of them.
I have not aligned myself with any party. Sitting tight waiting for an attractive offer.
I generally give the party in power, whether Republican or Democrat, the more digs because they are generally doing the country more damage. The party in power drawing a salary is to be knocked.
I hope some of the men who get the most votes will be elected.
A flock of Democrats will replace a mess of Republicans. It won’t mean a thing. They will go in like all the rest of ’em. Go in on promises and come out on alibis.
The Republicans mopped up, the Democrats gummed up, and I will now try and sum up. Things are terribly dull now. We won’t have any more serious comedy until Congress meets.
You’ve got to admit that each party is worse than the other. The one that’s out always looks the best.
If a man wants to stand well socially, he can’t afford to be seen with either the Democrats or the Republicans.
Republicans want a man that can lend dignity to the office. Democrats want a man that will lend some money.
Republicans have always been the party of big business. The Democrats of small business. So you just take your pick. The Democrats have their eye on a dime and the Republicans on a dollar.
If by some divine act of providence we could get rid of both parties and hire some good men, like any other good business does, that would be sitting pretty.
Both parties have their good times and bad times at different times. Good when they are out. Bad when they are in.
There ain’t any finer folks living than a Republican that votes the Democratic ticket.
Ohio claims they are due a president as they haven’t had one since Taft. Look at the United States, they have not had one since Lincoln.
You could keep politics clean if you could figure out some way so your government never hired anyone.
No mathematician in this country has ever been able to figure out how many hundred straw votes it takes to equal one legitimate vote.
No animal in the world gets quite as hungry as a Democrat. He would rather make a speech than a dollar.
The whole trouble with the Republicans is their fear of an increase in income tax, especially on higher incomes.
Sometimes it makes you think we don’t need a different man as much as we need different advisors for the same man.
If we could just send the same bunch of men to Washington for the good of the nation and not for political reasons, we could have the most perfect government in the world.
The truth can hurt you worse in an election than about anything that could happen to you.
---------------------
All these quotes, and many, many more, were before he was killed in 1935.
www.willrogers.com/says/will_says.html